Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Three Is Our Number....BUT...

It appears to be that time again. 


 Around 21 months ago I came to be with child.


 And the 21 months before that!


I can guarantee you our family is complete.  There will not be another.  Three is our number.

BUT, there are times when the urge is so great.  The wanting, the needing for another child. 
Thankfully it doesn't last long - a day, two days, 10 minutes. 

When I saw this account of human life by Tim a few weeks back, I was reduced to tears.  I was overwhelmed with emotion.  I wanted that feeling again, that high you get after giving birth and meeting your child for the first time. 

I needed another child.  

For me, having a newborn baby is one of the most beautiful things in the world.  The smell, the feeding, the love that is manifested.  But, as much as I wish they could, they don't stay that way for long.  The fact that my baby girl is already one saddens me.

And then I begin to think logically. 

For me, it's not about the pregnancy, or about the labour.  Both, I feel, are a priviledge bestowed upon me, and I could happily do that again.  (Isn't it great how we can forget the pain of labour!)  It's not even the sleepless nights.  As crap as they can be, they, too, pass. 

It's about the future.  It's about my mental health, our financial health, our plans to see the world, to educate.  These things would be made all that bit harder if our family were larger. 

We are so grateful and proud of the children that we have.  Grateful mostly that they, and we, are healthy.  We have been truly blessed by these three children and we could not ask for anything more.  Our family is now complete.

If it did turn out that the pattern was followed (which it hasn't been!), I would be with child again, and said child would be due in December.  If the urge is great around that time, we may have to be considering a puppy for Christmas!

So, what's your number?  Is your family complete?  Do you get these urges? Do they GO AWAY??

12 comments:

  1. we are the same, I see newborns and yearn for another. But realistically it's probably not going to happen. For the same reasons as you mentioned, unfortunately. that's why we got a puppy! xx

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    1. And Archie is the cutest damn puppy ever!

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  2. I have been thinking about this alot lately. Before I had Maks I though one was enough but that I would have two so they wouldn't be lonely. Now I think 3 might be our number. I like you would love to have more many more but I wonder how this would affect our future plans. So 3 maybe 4 or maybe we will just stick with 2 if the new one is not as well behaved as #1

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    1. Not long to go now either!! I hope number 2 is well behaved :)

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  3. ahhh you had the tears welling but none fell out!! seriously lady, it is so ridiculous that when I read your posts I could quite easily put my name at the bottom! I feel EXACTLY the same way. Eliot's pregnancy was very hard on my body, but I would do it again in a heartbeat. the way you described meeting them for the first time, I got goosebumps. I am saddened that I will never (probably?) feel that again. I think 3 is our number too. I always thought it would be 4. and our reasoning for no number 4 is the same as yours. and I hate that finance becomes a major player at this point. it is something our parents never thought about, even when they had nothing, there was always enough. a beautiful post x ps - mine were 19.5 and 21 so my gaps have passed!

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    1. You are so right about our parents. I am one of 5. I'm pretty sure finances didn't come into it.

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  4. Oh so many words could be said! I have 5 (one a year basically). My youngest will be 1 at the end of the month and not pregnant. It's a strange and unnerving feeling but we shall see. We desire at least 1 more.

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    1. Your family is amazing. You always look like you are having so much fun! x

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  5. Beautiful, just beautiful!

    I yearn for three, Dave is adamant about two.

    Purely financial, but it does upset me.

    However, I am grateful for my fertility :)

    Enjoy your beautiful family xx

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    1. I can see you with 3 :)
      And I agree, fertility should not be taken for granted x

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  6. What a beautiful, beautiful post. You could be inside my head. I love newborns, pregnancy, even labour. Such an amazing journey. We are currently at two, but feel that our number is three. I definitely want another and hoping all goes well I think it will happen. Then we will stop - but I'm sure the yearning will still be there. xx

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  7. 3 is our number too. But I am VERY happy and blessed to have a number 4 living in the house. I love you Marisa, Bailee, Mia and Bells.

    note to self...go get the snip!

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