Have you ever found yourself crying in the Dr's waiting room?
That was me yesterday. Crying for my son who was in so much pain and I was helpless to him.
I actually don't know where the tears came from, but once they started, they kept on flowing. I did have that moment where I thought "Don't cry in front of him, be strong", but I just couldn't. And when the Dr finally came and saw to us, I could barely even speak.
I could see in the Dr's eyes, he thought I was weak. Perhaps I was. But this came on the back of a stressful morning, a stressful few days actually.
Monday evening saw me in the emergency waiting rooms for 3 hours after Mila fell and hit her forehead on the coffee table. Thankfully stitches were not administered, and the wound was glued back together.
On Tuesday Jenson was showing some quite difficult behaviours. He was irritable and not coping with much, and also started refusing to go to the toilet, even though he was quite obviously needing to. He had become scared of urinating, thinking it was going to hurt him. So he continued to hold it. He held on from 1pm Tuesday. I took him to the Dr's on Wednesday morning, with no appointment, hoping for some help. After many physical and upsetting attempts to get him on the toilet, he was still too scared. By 11am Wednesday he had still not gone, and instead was squirming his way around the waiting room, tears streaming down his face and screaming with pain. My heartache for him, and frustrations for and with him boiled over in my own tears. He wouldn't let me help or console him.
Eventually I was able to cajole him to the toilet, and after some more screams of pain that it was hurting, he couldn't hold it any more.
Can you imagine holding on for 22 HOURS!!
I know that on the scale of illnesses which might upset parents, a potential UTI may be quite low, but yesterday truly broke my heart.